Quite possibly my favourite proper joke I’ve written is also one of the cheesiest christmas crackeriest but I love it. Still, that didn’t stop me spending a day or so re-working it over and over again gradually killing it. Anyway:
My mother married a scaffolder; now I’ve got a step-ladder.
And:
My mother married an aerobics instructor; now I’ve got a step-class.
My mother married Hermann Hesse; now I’ve got a step-penwolf.
My mother married a stop on the district line; now I’ve got a step-ney green.
My mother married Marsellus Wallace; now I’ve got a step-aside, Butch.
My mother married a horror writing poultry magnate; now I’ve got a step-hen king.
I feel sickened and ashamed.
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